
“When the fuck are you moving to New York?”
This question that rears its persistent end around the third or fourth drink whenever I’m with my NYC friends. Those words are mainly asked by Nick (of Alfargo’s fame), but lately I’ve been getting it more often from other pals; it’s even started to come up in my DMs without the need of alcohol. And as you guys already know (especially after my latest excursion), my answer has been the same: “I’m not moving.”
Don’t get me wrong, I like New York. Actually, I love New York. It’s an amazing city that has felt so accessible and welcoming thanks to the wonderful friends I’ve made through participating in this silly little hobby. The social group and recommended places are pre-vetted and locked in, making it easy to imagine what life would be like…if I was there already. That’s the real kicker. New York is great but it would be a big fuss to simply uproot my life to simply move to a place to hang out. And since I want to maintain distance from the Industry and maintain my status as a regular guy who simply likes to wear clothes, the proximity to the Menswear World isn’t that tempting (apart from the social events). Is that a hot take?
I just wish I could try and see what it would be like to simply live there, without much fuss. I realize that sublets are a thing, but the planning that goes into it and figuring out work logistics (I work on the West Coast team) is quite an undertaking. I’d rather put that energy into taking time off and simply focus on having fun! Of course, fate has a funny way of diving into my life.
Shortly after my last trip, my company announced that our NYC office was going to have a holiday party— and the LA team was invited! This was it. By staying in Manhattan and being required to work in the office at least a little bit, I had a little taste of what it would be like to be in NYC without being on vacation.
To be clear, I only really spent two nights in NYC (as this was the comp limit). But as expected, I jam packed my schedule.
In order to have as much time as possible, I booked my self a 6AM flight. I arrived Tuesday afternoon but thanks to traffic, didn’t get to my Chinatown hotel until evening, making it a mad scramble to catch up on emails and actually get work done after missing a majority of my day. Ultimately, this wasn’t a big deal considering that my friends work (mostly at stores), which meant that people weren’t free until around 7PM anyway. Daytime weekday hangs aren’t common when you’re an adult!
This fact made the hangs much more lowkey than previous editions, which I honestly enjoyed (especially for this “case study”). On Tuesday evening, after my emails were sent, me and 3-4 others (which obviously included Nick), simply got dinner at a local spot, moved over to grab soft serve, and then ended at a bar. Nothing too crazy! A similar move was done after my work holiday party (which ended at 10PM), where Nick just told me where to show up.
Granted, each night I got home at around 3AM (still made it to work on time tho) as we enjoy talking until the bar closed, but it was easy. I can’t shout out Nick enough for always putting together an easygoing, good time. I didn’t expect people to be free or to do anything spectacular as this trip was quite impromptu, but I was glad to see the ones who made it out!
The other side of this was being able to see what it would be like to work in NYC. Or to be even more clear, to see what it would be like to work in a physical office with people. My LA coworkers are quite spread out with hours of traffic between us, so there actually isn’t a proper office.
This is one reason why I am privileged to wear whatever I want, Stand Out, and base my fits on the Occasions I determine for myself. In other words, this trip functioned to finally force my clothing to be in communication with stakeholders (ish) in my life. Even though a fair bit of my coworkers are aware of my style (some of them have come across me on the internet) and that my chosen attire is largely work appropriate, it’s never truly been exposed to that paradigm.
As you most likely expected, it was totally fine! I had quite a few compliments from my coworkers and none of the hire ups told me I was dressed inappropriately. Some of this may be due to the fact that New York City is inherently stylish (there’s something about that forced visual communication due to public transportation/walking), but again, I think most people knew that “Ethan Wong” is almost always in tailoring and leather shoes. Also I’m a good worker and they all know that my dedication to expression doesn’t interfere with my performance. Also-also, a few visiting coworkers took a break to shop at ALD, so they were already “in the know”.
To be fair, I wasn’t dressed in “Full Ethan Mode”, as that requires access to my full wardrobe. I was on a trip after all. The weather in Manhattan was also projected to be a bit chilly with inclement weather, which I obviously needed to account for when packing for the trip. In other words, this meant I was wearing sweaters and turtleneck base layers underneath a checked sportcoat and the Cohérence trench coat I got during my last visit (which helped a lot). It wasn’t a fedora with a spearpoint and tie, but I still think it was quite Ethan. I think the beret I brought helped!
I returned home invigorated and exhausted, the latter mainly because I still had to find time to work in between meeting coworkers and literal travel. But this truly has given me a bit of insight into what it would be like to have a life in NYC. It honestly felt normal which is a good thing. It’s just another city full of friends and things to do that I can opt into at my leisure. Though I’m sure if I move there, I will be burnt out until I learn to say no (which would take a lot of time).
I am plenty aware that this trip is nothing more than a teasing taste. In reality, I wouldn’t work half days (we ended early for the holiday party) and would certainly not be able to live a 15 minute walk from the office. But at the very least, this has got me thinking about considering it. Maybe my job would be open to a sublet, provided I keep west coast hours and actually work from the office. The latter is truly the tough part, as I enjoy working remotely too much; I’m just so productive, not just at my job but in the chores of daily life!
But we’ll see. My tune has certainly changed, even if it is slight.
Are you happy now, Nick?
– end of blog post –





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Ethan M. Wong (follow me on IG)
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